The National Council for Adoption has launched a web campaign called iChooseAdoption.org. The heart of the campaign is a series of short YouTube videos featuring birth mothers telling their stories of placing their children for adoption.
To say they are “real” seems too flippant. But they are real: happiness, pain, joy, shame, certitude (or lack thereof), and everything else a birth mother experiences is revealed in the stories of these women.
I believe being pro-life will give unborn children a chance to grow and mature and fulfill their dreams to their fullest. They deserve to live and have a heartbeat, to feel the emotions of love and of being wanted. Taking away an innocent, helpless miracle is the worst thing one could possibly do.
Being able to feel the butterflies in your stomach when you are just starting to feel your baby kick, being able to see your little one grow from a tiny little ball to seeing the mouth move and the bones form in the baby’s face, being able to finally hold him or her after just giving birth – these are the most incredible feelings you can ever experience.
I am pro-life, but I used to be pro-choice. I once believed that if you did not want to take care of a baby, you didn’t have to.
I thought it was fine to “erase” your mistake and not have to worry about it. I could not have been more wrong. I am a living testimony of being pro-life. I went through a life-changing experience of putting my daughter up for adoption.
Giving birth to my daughter and feeling her warmth against my chest and her breath on my skin brought tears to my eyes. I could not believe I even thought of aborting such a precious human. I am so honored to have been able to give a family such an amazing gift. They were so grateful to be able to hold their daughter for the first time, and I was lucky to have been able to give them such a precious gift.
Doing adoption made me realize that babies change a life for the better. Yes, you are judged, some might not support you, and it is the hardest thing you might ever do – but the feeling of giving someone something they cannot have on their own is priceless. I cannot express how much good it does in your life. Your outlook on life changes, and you realize how precious it can be.
It was after I put my child up for adoption that I became pro-life. It is simply not fair to take a baby’s life when you have the opportunity to give your baby to a family who is desperately looking to love a child of their own.
Raised with Christian values, Kristin saw abortion as a way to cover up her secret: that she had given herself away sexually outside of marriage. She viewed the changes happening within her body as a mistake that needed to be dealt with.
Kristin decided to share her secret with someone she trusted, a youth pastor. He told her something that forever changed her life and the life of her baby.
“Abortion is not an option,” he said. “Two wrongs don’t make a right.” The kind pastor suggested that adoption would be a more loving option.
“His words reminded me that this was a baby we were talking about,” Kristin told LifeSiteNews in an interview.
“It was one of the hardest decisions that I have ever had to make,” she said.
On June 18, 1980, Kristin brought a beautiful baby girl into the world.
“Oh, how I loved her,” Kristin remembers.
Within days, Kristin signed the papers that released her tiny daughter into the arms of a Christian mother and father who she believed loved her daughter as much as she did.
Kristin, now 54, says she is forever thankful that she brought her daughter to term, choosing life over abortion.
“So somewhere in California there is a young lady in her 30’s, who is alive today, because I became pro-life.”
“And wherever you are Sweetheart, I still love you! ….. from a loving Mom.”
Everything was arranged before I was born, and when I was just five days old, my brother, Jeremy, carried me out with the caseworker to present me to my parents and bring me home. I had spiky hair and I was delivered with forceps, which temporarily pinched a nerve and made my mouth hang down on one side so I had a crooked smile. But when my brother carried me out in his six year old arms, he presented me to my parents and said, “Isn’t she pretty? Doesn’t she look just like me?!”
There are times when God intervenes in our lives in nearly flagrant ways. He interrupts the logical order of things, and turns everything upside down in the best way possible. In my case, He took me from being an unplanned pregnancy, to a pined-after, “chosen child” in a family where I have been inordinately loved.
Birthmother (and adoptee) stories are the missing piece in the open adoption puzzle. And an essential one, too. To really understand why birthmothers “give up” their children, how they feel about it afterwards, and how hopeful adoptive parents can increase their own chances of having a successful adoption match, you need to see and hear their stories first-hand.
Here are three that caught my eye. Hopefully, they’ll give you a better appreciation of what goes on behind the scenes during a placement and about the joys and tears that birthmothers in an open adoption experience.
Adoption is life-alteringly beneficial for children. Such is the general conclusion from a review of the literature. Adoption in the first 12 months of the child’s life produces the best outcomes, but all children will benefit, regardless of their age at placement. Adopted children outperform their non-adopted peers and non-adopted siblings.
On the whole, parents are very satisfied with their adopted children. These children, their biologicial mothers, and their adoptive families all benefit from and feel their lives are enriched by the experience.
Adoption is a powerful and emotionally potent act, for the birth mother and the prospective parents. The act of relinquishing a child to someone else and to take in a child, who is not biologically-related, is an incredible act of love and sacrifice. We need to foster an environment where people pursue adoption more and and the public is educated about the beautiful stories that typify the adoption experience.
This is the right time of year to focus on the things we like, the things we’re thankful for, the things that have changed our lives.
A few days ago, my wife and I didn’t know that one of those ‘things’ would cause us tears as we sat and watched an incredibly powerful short film called “I LIKE ADOPTION”. I’m adopted. My wife, Bethany, and I are adoptive parents. We really like adoption. But this creative effort struck us differently than anything we had seen before.
The story, with bursts of sun flares and gorgeous visuals, immediately takes ahold of your heart. I’m fighting tears, now, just thinking about it. One of the most beautiful pieces I’ve ever seen on adoption invites you into the hearts and home of a remarkable family—The Dennehys. With three biologically related children and nine specially chosen from around the world (with two from the U.S. foster care system), their home is an intriguing tapestry of hues, cultures, laughter and love.
“People discouraged us. They thought we were going to ruin our lives by taking all of these special kids, and they said ‘you don’t know what to do’. And, it’s true that we had no experience, and we didn’t really know how to raise them. But, you see what happens with unconditional love. You give a person unconditional love, and they blossom.”—Sharon Dennehy, mother of 12 children (nine of whom were adopted).